Trying to find feet.

New York and Philadelphia were nostalgic for him. When in Middletown he tried to find a NY and Philli in there. But that never appeared for him.

A strange deja vu had gripped him. He is still struggling to find feet in here. He is yet to believe that he is in US. Strange isnt it. He walways wanted to be there. Since ages. Since his work permit came. He knew one day he would go there. But may be the situation he went in wasnt too good. So thats looming in his back of the mind.

He wants to enjoy the life in USA but his primary aim was to execute the project successfully and wipe off the blot on his career that happened with Lexis Nexis. If the project is executed successfully he would be happy.

For now US is just seeming to be another event in the life.

Trying to find feet.

New York and Philadelphia were nostalgic for him. When in Middletown he tried to find a NY and Philli in there. But that never appeared for him.

A strange deja vu had gripped him. He is still struggling to find feet in here. He is yet to believe that he is in US. Strange isnt it. He walways wanted to be there. Since ages. Since his work permit came. He knew one day he would go there. But may be the situation he went in wasnt too good. So thats looming in his back of the mind.

He wants to enjoy the life in USA but his primary aim was to execute the project successfully and wipe off the blot on his career that happened with Lexis Nexis. If the project is executed successfully he would be happy.

For now US is just seeming to be another event in the life.

Being uncomfortable

He was uncomfortable going out with his couple acquaintances. Somehow it made him awkward and he remembered his past. That was just incidental. He had moved on and wanted to settle down for good, but whenever he went out to dinner or movies with his couple friends, he felt a bit outsider. The memories rankled him. And when a girl used to seat near him, he was all the way more cautious. He wouldnt speak, give an occasional smile and then lose back to his thoughts.

And today when he had a eggplant palmer pasta, he felt he was a disaster. The eggplants tasted shit and he felt like puking there. Somehow he controlled and a coke refill served him just about right. Not that he was anti-social but just that he was uncomfortable yet to mix with couples. Perhaps the ol'd intensity was too much to leave him to see that again in his eyes and not find her with him.

Something wasnt right with him when he mixed.

Being uncomfortable

He was uncomfortable going out with his couple acquaintances. Somehow it made him awkward and he remembered his past. That was just incidental. He had moved on and wanted to settle down for good, but whenever he went out to dinner or movies with his couple friends, he felt a bit outsider. The memories rankled him. And when a girl used to seat near him, he was all the way more cautious. He wouldnt speak, give an occasional smile and then lose back to his thoughts.

And today when he had a eggplant palmer pasta, he felt he was a disaster. The eggplants tasted shit and he felt like puking there. Somehow he controlled and a coke refill served him just about right. Not that he was anti-social but just that he was uncomfortable yet to mix with couples. Perhaps the ol'd intensity was too much to leave him to see that again in his eyes and not find her with him.

Something wasnt right with him when he mixed.

Calling it over.

When you cant get over the insecurities of past you tend to attack the person in question and then want to break off on a silly and petty issue. It doesnt put the other person in bad light, it just puts you in a bad light questioning the intent and your worthiness as person.

When it gets over, its really over. Its great actually.

Calling it over.

When you cant get over the insecurities of past you tend to attack the person in question and then want to break off on a silly and petty issue. It doesnt put the other person in bad light, it just puts you in a bad light questioning the intent and your worthiness as person.

When it gets over, its really over. Its great actually.

Paanch Ka Dum

Ok now the tag time. This time from super cool blogger Vyshu, one who is gettin lotsa comments and awards. Rightly so. Her writings are refreshing.

Before I begin the tag, I loved Pizzaloni s super comic snaps on her blog. Thats PJ for us. Priya Joyce or Darshini Joyce. Call her whatever.....

So the tag.

My favorite words :

1) Ohhhhh(Musical voice, not plain)
2) Fu***k (every time anythin goes wrong)
3) Alrightyyyyyyyyyy (Thanks to Gary, my previous US manager)
4) Sup ? (Short for Whassup or wots up)
5) Bhiyao (Indori slang, every Indori speaks it no matter where on the globe)

My favorite Celebrity Crushes :

1) Priyanka Chopra
2) Kristen Stewart (Bella of Twilight....)
3) Kajal
4) Deepika Padukone ...very easy going and girl next door.
5) Kareena Kapoor (I m Bollywood buff, so rarely a Hollywood lass here)

My favorite literary characters

1) Bella from Twilight series. I perfectly relate with her thoughts. The way she has expressed her feelings.
2) Carlisle Cullen from Twilight series. He must be real kewl person.
3) Holly Kennedy from PS : I Love You
4) Edward Cullen from Twilight series
5) Shyam from One night @ Call Center. I could relate to him perfectly.

I would skip comic characters as I hardly watch or read them.

My favorite movie characters : My addition

1) Raj from DDLJ
2) Anthony from Amar Akbar Anthony
3) Chris Gardner from Pursuit of Happyness
4) Nik from Salam Namastey
5) Karan from Hum Tum

My favorite childhood memories

1) Get togethers at our places when all of 5 bros would meet and play cricket day long.
2) Going to meet my grandmother every day since age of 6. Longing for her to spoon feed me, listen to her stories, make her prepare and feed me "gul tup poli" (Roti with gud and ghee) and paranthe.
3) Going out with my dad, mom and younger sister on a Vijay Super way back in 80s. It was a very strong scooter and I remember 3 scooters all carrying 3 families (4 members each, my uncles n my father, aunts n mom and 2 kids per family) to every get together in the city. This was long before each of us got older n went out or even each of the 3 houses of our families got their own car.
4) Puran Poli every religious occasion.
5) Summer weddings of cousins older to me by ages. Meant lot of fun and lot of eating up.

Jo chahe tag kar lo. But I want PJ, Swetha, Ria, Pallav, Urvashi, Sneha and our celebrity blogger Kajal to do the tag.

iPhone Drama.

Okay. 24 hours of drama finally sets in. Exhausted and tired. Relaxed and shocked. Mixed feelings. Once again a question in my mind, why do i end up messing everything. Jerkish reaction, lot of confusion and flip flop. On, off, on and off.

I am continously losing my way here in America. In the office, in the apartment, in the mall and in the cafeteria. Memory loss ? Last week I forgot to get down from the bus and I went far ahead before it could dawn to me that boy i m well ahead where i shud have got down.

I am pathetic when it comes down to settling in new places. Be it NJ, be it Philli or be it Middletown. Didnt take time to settle in NY though. I m a big city guy. Easily settled in Mumbai 6 yrs back. Too cautious and too slow.

Chuck it. Back to the drama.

I got my iPhone 3GS last night almost same time. Long time ambition fulfilled. Excited like a kid. Would put my 9 yr old niece n 4 yr old nephew to shame. So then wanted to put in my SIM card of T-mobile in the phone. Inserted the pin in the hole to prick out the sim card tray. Whoop, it didnt come out. Tried more. Didnt come out. Hole got bigger. And when I gave up and my roomie came, he said Boss tray nikal nahi raha hai. I was like what the fuck.

Mood off. Slept without dinner. Got up in the morning. Checked google n other sites. No description of my problem. I built up my strategy. Went to walmart iphone center, lady refused to pick out the sim tray. Disappointed in the lunch break went to att center, she refused. My roomie had cajoled me not to go to Apple Store good 20 miles away. But bhai me to me hu. Jo man me aaya hai wo to karoonga. Long time dream hai to pura karuunga. Cost cutting kahi aur ho jayegi.

So finally called cab and went to Farmington city to get the phone replaced. Bhai ne phone replace kiya lekin t-mobile ka sim dekh ke dimag kharab ho gaya. Finally phone de diya. I was relaxed. I was too confused in the day what to do. Do i return the phone and then regret ? Do i go spend 100 bucks and then cherish the long dream. It took me long time to decide before i finally decided i would go in and try the option.

I was tense in the apple store how to get back home. It was 20 miles. My passport, office laptop, wallet, iPhone were with me and the driver was a African American which later turned to be my neigbhour :P.

Right now its an hour I m back without food, without nething in the stomach. I have put in my tummy quite a deal back.

I am yet to start enjoying the trip here. Lack of transport makes me crippled and dependent on others which I hate. This blog stays, other one goes off. SRK detention ke saath wo blog goes. Tired. BTW i forgot to add that I had my first meeting with the client on my own and he was happy. My American ascent was good too. Though fake one, but then they understand it. Indian ascent no one does. Yo Baby.

Change could happen and

I might have a change of heart and continue to blog here itself.

Eggs, tomatoes, brickbats. I know all are lining up......

Being Insecure

Some things dont work out. Some things need time to evolve. Some discussions need time. Some connections need time to be fruitful. When you need time, you need to have patience. You need to bid for time to make sure you get what you are running behind.

Long distance talks for an alliance are one such thing. Allegations and fault finding doesnt work. Being egoistic doesnt work.

And then mental strength and all that doesnt matter. Discussions invite agreements and disagreements. Snapping and accusations are not in.

The ones who retort to this are fake entities. Insecure self. Scary to be with.

Being Insecure

Some things dont work out. Some things need time to evolve. Some discussions need time. Some connections need time to be fruitful. When you need time, you need to have patience. You need to bid for time to make sure you get what you are running behind.

Long distance talks for an alliance are one such thing. Allegations and fault finding doesnt work. Being egoistic doesnt work.

And then mental strength and all that doesnt matter. Discussions invite agreements and disagreements. Snapping and accusations are not in.

The ones who retort to this are fake entities. Insecure self. Scary to be with.